I want to wrap up this mini-series about the tools of recovery today because tomorrow I am intending to start going through Proverbs...starting on the first with Proverbs 1. I am laughing, though, because my intention was to do one a day for 31 days..but in February, there are only 29 days! Well, we'll do the last two in March. No big deal.
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On the tools, we already talked about abstinence, sponsors and the telephone. The other things that help me to stay on the road in recovery are meetings, literature, service, anonymity, prayer and meditation and exercise, not necessarily in order of importance.
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Prayer and meditation, along with exercise are not mentioned in OA's pamplet "Tools of Recovery," but for me that are what has brought me to the place where I am today--happy and free from food obsession and overeating.
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Meetings: for me initially I showed up at meetings so that I could learn about the disease of food addiction and compulsive overeating. I didn't have a clue about addiction, but felt at home when I walked into the rooms of OA and heard that others were "crazy" like me. In time I found a sponsor and asked how to get on the road to recovery.
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Today I still go to meetings, to remember who I am, but also to give away what I have been given. I love to share the good news of recovery to those who are seeking a solution.
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I go to two committed 90dayOA phone meetings a week and two committed 12-steps for Christians meetings a week, one face-to-face and one phone meetings, in order to work the steps of the program. For me, I know that after abstinence, the steps are what changed my life--my way of thinking, relating to people and to God.
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For me, prayer and meditation is not an option. It's a must! I get on my knees faithfully every morning, typically for l/2 hour, and then meet with God after lunch for at least l5 minutes...but I also talk to God throughout the day. My goal is to "pray without ceasing"...like breathing. I practice that, but cannot say that I am "there" yet.
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Service is helping others. There are many thinks linked into this tool--sponsoring people, making phone calls, taking a service position at a meeting, helping to set-up the room at a face-to-face meeting, and the rest.
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Anonymity is respecting the fact that what people say in the meeting rooms or to me personally is held in confidence. It is important for me to stay out of judgement.
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Literature is important for me to see in black and white what addiction is all about. Kay Sheppard's book, Food Addiction; The Body Knows, helps me to understand the specifics about food addiction, but the Big Book of AA helps me to understand the addicts' mind-set. The Bible teaches me God's Word.
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There are other peices of literature that I use from time to time. I appreciate the Little Black Book or AA and the Little White Book of OA. They are daily meditation books. Personally, I prefer the Little Black Book because it's more on a spiritual plane.
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Exercise is another tool that helps me to feel good in my body, my mind, too. I don't do a lot, but I am consistent. I do a mile Walk-away-the-pounds video Monday through Friday.
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I have heard that the tools are not cafeteria-style--take what you want and leave the rest. I do all the tools every day.
Showing posts with label tools of recovery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tools of recovery. Show all posts
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Friday, October 26, 2007
Writing
The tool of writing helps me get to the nitty gritty and also connects me with God on a deeper level. When I put my pen to paper and begin, "God...I need Your help..." my thoughts flow. I can say exactly what I am feeling without worrying about my words, my spelling, acceptable grammer or what anyone thinks.
Sometimes I am angry and I yell and scream to God. He always listens with His loving kindness. I can imagine His smiling face as He nods His head waiting for me to calm down. He knows that I will eventually ask Him what He wants me to do...but He WAITS.
He already knows what I am thinking. It's me who needs to sort it out and get beyond the emotional upheaval...be it anger, hurt, rejection, pride, whatever...somtimes it's just confusion.
God has my answers. And it's the truth that sets me free every time.
I also use the tool of writing each day when I report my intended food plan for the day on foodaddictsfulloffaith@yahoogroups.com, and when I write about the "key" for the day on the 12-steps AWOLforchristians@yahoogroups.com loop.
I write to sponsees responding to questions and trying to help and encourage them, and each time I come to the fourth step inventory in my ongoing step study, I put my pen to paper and investigate a little more of my past and present behaviors.
The tool of writing has helped me to get and stay free from food obsession and compulsive overating. It's probably one of the more important tools for my personal growth, although all the tools are useful for different reasons.
I have heard that we cannot pick and choose the tools of recovery. Some people say that it is not "cafeteria style." I thought that was cute and sort of funny, but after writing about all the tools, I can see truth in that statement. I use all the tools everyday.
This program works for me because I work it!
Sometimes I am angry and I yell and scream to God. He always listens with His loving kindness. I can imagine His smiling face as He nods His head waiting for me to calm down. He knows that I will eventually ask Him what He wants me to do...but He WAITS.
He already knows what I am thinking. It's me who needs to sort it out and get beyond the emotional upheaval...be it anger, hurt, rejection, pride, whatever...somtimes it's just confusion.
God has my answers. And it's the truth that sets me free every time.
I also use the tool of writing each day when I report my intended food plan for the day on foodaddictsfulloffaith@yahoogroups.com, and when I write about the "key" for the day on the 12-steps AWOLforchristians@yahoogroups.com loop.
I write to sponsees responding to questions and trying to help and encourage them, and each time I come to the fourth step inventory in my ongoing step study, I put my pen to paper and investigate a little more of my past and present behaviors.
The tool of writing has helped me to get and stay free from food obsession and compulsive overating. It's probably one of the more important tools for my personal growth, although all the tools are useful for different reasons.
I have heard that we cannot pick and choose the tools of recovery. Some people say that it is not "cafeteria style." I thought that was cute and sort of funny, but after writing about all the tools, I can see truth in that statement. I use all the tools everyday.
This program works for me because I work it!
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Prayer and meditation
Prayer and meditation is an important part of my everyday life. It's a recovery tool that keeps me aware of God's will and calms me when I am anxious or afraid.
For me, I have a specific time in the afternoon that I reserve for God. It's our "afternoon delight" (half-smiling). I have learned that I cannot have an intimate relationship with someone if I don't invest time and energy and devotion to that person. I am willing to get intimate with God. He knows the ins and outs of me, even before I tell Him my thoughts and feelings.
I have different ways that I meditate, depending on my needs, thoughts and feelings for the day. I often bring a Scripture reading before the Lord, and He helps me to hear it into my head and heart.
Sometimes I repeat a Scripture over and over to calm me when I am riddled with fear or anxiety. "Be still and know that I am God" is one that I use often. Then I reduce it to "Be still and know..." then "Be still..." then "Be." When I start thinking other thoughts, I go right back to the whole Scripture reading and go through the process again.
"It's a new day to rejoice and be glad" works for me...or "God's mercies are new every morning" or "The Lord is my shepherd; I have everything that I need."
These are Scriptures that I repeat everyday with my daily commitment each day on foodaddictsfulloffaith@yahoogroups.com. They have become my way of life because God has brought them into my being through many hours of meditation and prayer.
Step 11: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscience contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
I also meditate with a specific goal in mind. If I am troubled, I sit with God and ask what He would have me do. Prayer is asking and meditation is listening.
For me, I have a specific time in the afternoon that I reserve for God. It's our "afternoon delight" (half-smiling). I have learned that I cannot have an intimate relationship with someone if I don't invest time and energy and devotion to that person. I am willing to get intimate with God. He knows the ins and outs of me, even before I tell Him my thoughts and feelings.
I have different ways that I meditate, depending on my needs, thoughts and feelings for the day. I often bring a Scripture reading before the Lord, and He helps me to hear it into my head and heart.
Sometimes I repeat a Scripture over and over to calm me when I am riddled with fear or anxiety. "Be still and know that I am God" is one that I use often. Then I reduce it to "Be still and know..." then "Be still..." then "Be." When I start thinking other thoughts, I go right back to the whole Scripture reading and go through the process again.
"It's a new day to rejoice and be glad" works for me...or "God's mercies are new every morning" or "The Lord is my shepherd; I have everything that I need."
These are Scriptures that I repeat everyday with my daily commitment each day on foodaddictsfulloffaith@yahoogroups.com. They have become my way of life because God has brought them into my being through many hours of meditation and prayer.
Step 11: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscience contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
I also meditate with a specific goal in mind. If I am troubled, I sit with God and ask what He would have me do. Prayer is asking and meditation is listening.
Monday, October 22, 2007
Prayer as a way of life
When I "pray without ceasing," I live a balanced, happy, contented life each new day.
In the 12-step process, I learned that I needed to trust God--to lean on and depend on Him for everything. There is nothing, absolutely nothing, that God cannot help me overcome, absolutely nothing!
Today, I talk to the Lord throughout my moment-to-moment walk through life. Whenever I get that questioning feeling of wanting to control somebody or something or wanting to react because of my fear of abandonment or rejection or my judgement and pride, I immediately ask God for help... He leads and directs me to do or say the next "right" thing.
It's the tenth step--continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
In long-term recovery, I am better at walking through the process BEFORE I have to apologize for reacting inappropriately. I thank God for that. I still fall into my old way of life from time-to-time, but I know that I can always say "sorry" and move forward, striving toward the goal of being all that God wants and expects me to be today. There is no perfect this side of Heaven!
Tomorrow, I'll talk about Step Eleven--Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscience contact with God...
In the 12-step process, I learned that I needed to trust God--to lean on and depend on Him for everything. There is nothing, absolutely nothing, that God cannot help me overcome, absolutely nothing!
Today, I talk to the Lord throughout my moment-to-moment walk through life. Whenever I get that questioning feeling of wanting to control somebody or something or wanting to react because of my fear of abandonment or rejection or my judgement and pride, I immediately ask God for help... He leads and directs me to do or say the next "right" thing.
It's the tenth step--continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
In long-term recovery, I am better at walking through the process BEFORE I have to apologize for reacting inappropriately. I thank God for that. I still fall into my old way of life from time-to-time, but I know that I can always say "sorry" and move forward, striving toward the goal of being all that God wants and expects me to be today. There is no perfect this side of Heaven!
Tomorrow, I'll talk about Step Eleven--Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscience contact with God...
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Meetings
Meetings are a great way to introduce people to the program and keep the old-timers in the process of recovery.
I remember when I first walked into the rooms of Overeaters Anonymous, I was welcomed and I felt at home in a matter of minutes when I heard other people talking about doing the same things that I was doing with food. I was no longer alone.
At meetings, food addicts and compulsive overeaters join hands in their goal to get and stay free from succumbing to the disease...and yes, I heard in the rooms of OA and FAA that I have a disease...
I am not stupid, weak-willed or uncaring about what I was doing to my body, I have a disease. When I put sugar, flour and wheat into my body, it sets up a craving for more (that's food addiction), but beyond that, I am also a compulsive overeater, which means that I tend to overeat for emotional reasons, and I can overdose on any food, even lettuce! More is always better in my book.
That's why I have a weighed and measured food plan. It's not an option to overeat no matter what is happening in my circumstances or how I feel.
At meetings, I hear what other people do. I hear what works and what doesn't work. I don't always agree with everyone. That's okay. I ask God for help in discerning what I need, and then I take what I want and leave the rest.
For me, too, I commit to showing up at certain meetings each week. I go to one face-to-face 12-steps for Christians Meeting (Tuesday night), and then two 90dayOA phone meetings (8AM on Sat and Sun) and then a 12-steps for Christians phone meeting on Sunday night at 5:30PM.
I also do an on-line meeting/loop, AWOLforchristians@yahoogroups.com, where I "work" the steps each day (Mon - Fri).
I remember when I first walked into the rooms of Overeaters Anonymous, I was welcomed and I felt at home in a matter of minutes when I heard other people talking about doing the same things that I was doing with food. I was no longer alone.
At meetings, food addicts and compulsive overeaters join hands in their goal to get and stay free from succumbing to the disease...and yes, I heard in the rooms of OA and FAA that I have a disease...
I am not stupid, weak-willed or uncaring about what I was doing to my body, I have a disease. When I put sugar, flour and wheat into my body, it sets up a craving for more (that's food addiction), but beyond that, I am also a compulsive overeater, which means that I tend to overeat for emotional reasons, and I can overdose on any food, even lettuce! More is always better in my book.
That's why I have a weighed and measured food plan. It's not an option to overeat no matter what is happening in my circumstances or how I feel.
At meetings, I hear what other people do. I hear what works and what doesn't work. I don't always agree with everyone. That's okay. I ask God for help in discerning what I need, and then I take what I want and leave the rest.
For me, too, I commit to showing up at certain meetings each week. I go to one face-to-face 12-steps for Christians Meeting (Tuesday night), and then two 90dayOA phone meetings (8AM on Sat and Sun) and then a 12-steps for Christians phone meeting on Sunday night at 5:30PM.
I also do an on-line meeting/loop, AWOLforchristians@yahoogroups.com, where I "work" the steps each day (Mon - Fri).
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Sponsors
In order of importance, for me I have seen that sponsors come after food plans, although now that I say that out loud, meetings probably come before both of these. I'll talk about meetings tomorrow.
Sponsors are members of OA or FAA or FA or 90dayOA or whatever 12-step support groups works for the person (for me it is 90dayOA), who have successfully achieved abstinence and are living the 12-steps as a way of life.
It is written in the OA meeting format, "Find a sponsor who has what you want and ask how he or she is achieving it." That's pretty much it in a nutshell, although, I offer a note of caution because there are many different food plans, many different approaches to food addiction and many different styles of sponsoring. Besides the fact that some people are compulsive overeaters, not necessarily food addicts, which can make a huge difference in the way that they sponsor.
For me, I am a food addict AND a compulsive overeater, which means that even without sugar, flour, wheat and artificial sweeteners and caffeine, I can still be emotionally triggered to overeat. And I can overdose on a head of lettuce! It's not necessarily some especially nummy food. (Is "nummy" a word?...I would expect that you get what I am talking about).
With those facts in hand, I needed to find a sponsor who understood my "stuff," but beyond that I needed someone who would love me through the process until I could love myself and ultimately find and experience God's love in my everyday life. That's the goal...to be restored to the love of God.
In my history, I've gone through many helpful and not-so-helpful sponsors. Before I knew any better, I sometimes felt that it was my fault that I couldn't do what some sponsors wanted me to do, and sometimes I was not willing, but other times, the expectations were beyond reason for me at that time in my life.
For me, today, when my sponsor makes a suggestion, I am in constant prayer...and also find solace in talking to other successful food addicts, asking what they do to stay free and clean.
Sponsors are members of OA or FAA or FA or 90dayOA or whatever 12-step support groups works for the person (for me it is 90dayOA), who have successfully achieved abstinence and are living the 12-steps as a way of life.
It is written in the OA meeting format, "Find a sponsor who has what you want and ask how he or she is achieving it." That's pretty much it in a nutshell, although, I offer a note of caution because there are many different food plans, many different approaches to food addiction and many different styles of sponsoring. Besides the fact that some people are compulsive overeaters, not necessarily food addicts, which can make a huge difference in the way that they sponsor.
For me, I am a food addict AND a compulsive overeater, which means that even without sugar, flour, wheat and artificial sweeteners and caffeine, I can still be emotionally triggered to overeat. And I can overdose on a head of lettuce! It's not necessarily some especially nummy food. (Is "nummy" a word?...I would expect that you get what I am talking about).
With those facts in hand, I needed to find a sponsor who understood my "stuff," but beyond that I needed someone who would love me through the process until I could love myself and ultimately find and experience God's love in my everyday life. That's the goal...to be restored to the love of God.
In my history, I've gone through many helpful and not-so-helpful sponsors. Before I knew any better, I sometimes felt that it was my fault that I couldn't do what some sponsors wanted me to do, and sometimes I was not willing, but other times, the expectations were beyond reason for me at that time in my life.
For me, today, when my sponsor makes a suggestion, I am in constant prayer...and also find solace in talking to other successful food addicts, asking what they do to stay free and clean.
Monday, October 15, 2007
A plan of eating
This week, I am starting a series on the tools of recovery.
In my opinion, the first and most important "tool" for a food addict (like me) is a plan of eating.
For me, I did my time, so to speak, and tried to do my food plan my way....eating what I thought was a healthy plan, and it would have been healthy for a normal eater, but for a food addict, it just didn't work.
I have to be honest. It was hard for me to wrap my head around needing to give up certain foods. I gave myself credit for being well-versed in nutrition and had time and money invested in researching different diets and weight-loss programs.
However, nothing worked long-term UNTIL I was willing to look at the specific foods that people in OA were telling me were drugs to me (as a food addict). I simply didn't get it and I wanted to be different from these "fanatics". Even though I identified with their craziness, I SO WANTED TO BE DIFFERENT! I heard them, but I somehow acted as if I had some special powers to do what I wanted to do.
I was not totally blind. I could see that sugar was in "junk" food, (ie: sweets and treats), and I was okay not having those foods, but a little sugar in this and that...How could that hurt? or so I convinced myself... And whole wheat bread, how could that be "bad"?
Well, in time, dear friends, I was tired of fighting. I was tired of failing. I was just tired.
So, I listened to people who were successfully following their food plans, and I said, "Maybe you're right." I got a sponsor and eliminated sugar and flour...and in time, I gave up wheat, all artificial sweeteners and caffeine, too.
Today, I follow a committed weighed and measured food plan (without my drugs--sugar, flour, wheat, artificial sweeteners and caffeine). I eat three meals and a snack before bed. I love what I do. My life is no longer about wanting more food, but about the 12 steps of recovery and living life to the fullest.
Check out Step Easy Food Plan on my web site: www.fulloffaith.com for more information or if you want to see what I do each day, go to foodaddictsfulloffaith@yahoogroups.com. I commit my food plan each day to the loop.
In my opinion, the first and most important "tool" for a food addict (like me) is a plan of eating.
For me, I did my time, so to speak, and tried to do my food plan my way....eating what I thought was a healthy plan, and it would have been healthy for a normal eater, but for a food addict, it just didn't work.
I have to be honest. It was hard for me to wrap my head around needing to give up certain foods. I gave myself credit for being well-versed in nutrition and had time and money invested in researching different diets and weight-loss programs.
However, nothing worked long-term UNTIL I was willing to look at the specific foods that people in OA were telling me were drugs to me (as a food addict). I simply didn't get it and I wanted to be different from these "fanatics". Even though I identified with their craziness, I SO WANTED TO BE DIFFERENT! I heard them, but I somehow acted as if I had some special powers to do what I wanted to do.
I was not totally blind. I could see that sugar was in "junk" food, (ie: sweets and treats), and I was okay not having those foods, but a little sugar in this and that...How could that hurt? or so I convinced myself... And whole wheat bread, how could that be "bad"?
Well, in time, dear friends, I was tired of fighting. I was tired of failing. I was just tired.
So, I listened to people who were successfully following their food plans, and I said, "Maybe you're right." I got a sponsor and eliminated sugar and flour...and in time, I gave up wheat, all artificial sweeteners and caffeine, too.
Today, I follow a committed weighed and measured food plan (without my drugs--sugar, flour, wheat, artificial sweeteners and caffeine). I eat three meals and a snack before bed. I love what I do. My life is no longer about wanting more food, but about the 12 steps of recovery and living life to the fullest.
Check out Step Easy Food Plan on my web site: www.fulloffaith.com for more information or if you want to see what I do each day, go to foodaddictsfulloffaith@yahoogroups.com. I commit my food plan each day to the loop.
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