Anonymity

When I first walked into the 12-steps rooms, anonymity was a foreign word for me. Abstinence was a new word for me, too, now that I think of it. It wasn't long before I understood that abstinence meant refraining from sugar and flour and having a weighed and measured food plan, but anonymity took longer to understand. Maybe because I was still in the food and my clarity was masked by my pain.

Anonymity means that what I hear at meetings or on the phone stays with me. It is not an option to talk about, judge or criticize anyone to anyone. And in my personal recovery, I do not give myself permission to judge or criticize people even to myself.

When I am tempted to entertain my critical nature, I say, "God bless them and change me" as I let God do His handiwork in them and in me.

Anonymity also refers to people outside the 12-steps halls. We don't use our full names or let our pictures be taken for press or radio with specific anonymous 12-steps groups mentioned, and if we see someone on the street, we are careful to avoid the mention of our ties to the program. That keeps us safe and allows us the freedom to be honest at meetings.

For me, in my book and in my one television appearance, as a representative of the Christian 12-step way of life, I have mentioned "12-step support groups" but don't say which group or groups I attend.

What I share here and on the loops that I founded, I can say what I do...and where I do it. It's personal and my recovery journey. I can do that because this is not an anonymous 12-step group.